Am I really old?

On June 29, 2014July 1, 2014 By JillIn Uncategorized5 Comments

A few days ago, we had a trip into NYC, we were meeting up with my in laws, who were celebrating their 40th anniversary. My husband and brother in law planned a super fun day…we started out at lunch at Pier 66 Maritime, it was awesome, the weather was gorgeous and we were all having cocktails and eating lunch outside…

At one point, my Aunt was pointing to a group of ladies eating behind us, saying that, “Just think, in 15 years, those could be your daughters.” I whipped around to see what she was talking about…it was a group of attractive young ladies having drinks and socializing…I turned back and laughed but what I really was thinking was, “Huh- my daughters…I don’t think so, those girls are me! Add a few ladies and this could be me and my friends! I could totally see myself hanging out with the girls, frolicking in a sundress, sipping a Cosmo, checking out the scene…”

Do you ever find yourself forgetting you’re not so young anymore, like an awesome song comes on the radio and your right back in a bar or a club? That doesn’t happen to me as much as it used to, like when I first had a baby…I was still able to meet friends for lunch and the baby was more like a glorified tote that I had to carry around and occasionally feed. During those lunches I still felt young and free.

Fast forward to today, where my pedicure is half chipped off because my kids can’t seem to stop stepping on my feet, I always have something stained or stuck to my clothes, I wear mom shorts, I tend to have a blank or worried look going on ( not the open, smiling, come hither, seductive face I used to use to flaunt —- JUST KIDDING! Just figured I could dream for a minute… Flirty yes, seductive, not so much…but there’s still time…

I love this life and wouldn’t change it in a million years and despite the 50% put together look, I am feeling more fulfilled than I ever have…and p.s. It’s ten pm on a Saturday night and I am writing this! We already had an amazing time with friends and kids tonight…but the party is over! And my husband is already asleep. Ha – remember when we used to go out at ten.
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Greek yogurt and happy thoughts

On June 28, 2014June 28, 2014 By JillIn Health eating, Mommy Musings, Sugar and Snack LessLeave a comment

Hi everyone! Just a quick post to say we are starting out strong with a happy, healthy breakfast. After yesterday’s post, Closing the Sweet Shop I needed to begin with a bang! Gia and Arianna were so giddy with happiness to get their smiley breakfast. I tell ya, it doesn’t take much, just do something so simple like make a raisin face with a strawberry smile and they are in heaven…

This was plain Greek yogurt, mixed with mashed bananas, and a little honey. A whole grain waffle and a side of strawberries… Yum!

Later on today, the girls were thrilled to have simple graham crackers…Ahh, I am feeling calmer already…Way better than Cheez-Its and frosting…

I actually had to say good bye to Cheez-Its a while back but forgot to post about it!

They don’t seem to be missing any oatmeal raisin frosted cookie bars…

Closing the sweet shop

On June 28, 2014 By JillIn Health eating, Mommy Confessions, Sugar and Snack Less, The Cookie Chronicles, Uncategorized, What's Going On?4 Comments

I just want to put some closure on the subject of Baking.

This is so hard for me to write about because I haven’t wanted to face the music, I have wanted to carry on like I have been, people thinking I am fine, writing my humorous posts and baking for everyone and their mothers…in the past three weeks, I have baked for the last music class, the last dance class, the last gymnastic class, the last day of school, barbeques, friends, family, and even store associates – Gazde- if your reading this, I loved baking and bringing you cookies and I love my cookies and I love making people happy with my sweets so don’t feel bad! BUT, and this is a huge BUT…

I can’t do this anymore, the constant flow of chocolate chips, licking of bowls, muffins, frosting, baking craziness- runs to the store, snacking or buying of treats for my girls, thinking about what everyone would like, what so and so likes – the oatmeal ones or the chocolate ones – what Gia’s teacher likes – frosting, and what my family likes… It’s become out of control…I am not a baker by profession, nor would I ever have chosen to be surrounded with frosting and crumbs, remember- food issues here…kind of like an alcoholic working at a bar… this isn’t my job (although it seems like it has been recently- even Gia said the other day when I ran out of flour- “Mom, you’re not even like a Mom anymore, you’re like a baker.” Yikes- isn’t that food for thought…

I feel as if baking gave me an identity, a sense of purpose, and the comments were impossible to ignore, “Jill, you’ve outdone yourself…she’s the best baker, thank you so much…the delight in people’s eyes when they eat a cookie…we love Jill’s cookies…you should start a business, how do you find the time? (That one I love the most, (sound familiar Kris?) etc…” Hard to stop bringing the goods when you feel special and important…

The truth is I am not doing “well” with baked goods and snacks. It’s just not the lifestyle I am happy living. Excess wheat and sugar seem to be aggravating anxiety and my Arianna is growing up with chocolate as a fifth food group. Nothing wrong with a bit of chocolate here and there but she hears the crinkling of a plastic bag, and is like “I want chocolate chips!”

I’ve been thinking about this for a while and I’m ready, this time – for good. The shop is closed. I love my friends and family, my kids’ teachers, and I love how it felt to bake and deliver, but I can’t be the happy, chocolate wagon anymore.

I’m setting sail for fruit islands…I may serve up a low sugar banana bread…but besides that, I am taking care of me and focusing on this family of four.

Ahhh, smelling the sweet summer fruit.