Eating Nonsense

On July 10, 2014July 10, 2014 By JillIn Mommy Musings, What's Going On?4 Comments

Dealing with the dervish…

“Vroom…vroom…there she goes, like a whirling dervish…” my husband used to say to me when I would get caught in an obsessive spinning cycle…

It’s not like I literally spun around the house like a spider on crack but I just tend to get obsessive about things (yes, broken record here…Jill is obsessive) don’t worry this isn’t going to be one of those annoying posts where I am not writing anymore or not baking anymore…I promised a month ago I wouldn’t post about writing or not writing and I stuck to it.

I wrote about not baking anymore and I am not sticking to that! Of course I will bake again. I don’t care. I am done, done, done with any more posts, thoughts, ideas about quitting anything…here I am on vacation, away from every day life, and just realizing how stupid and nonsensical those thoughts were…there is so much going on in the world, and since we are away I have had more time to watch the news in the morning and see what’s really important, to laugh with my family, and to have fun…

Taking a break from the pool!

We are so cute!

Seeing these girls having so much fun at the boardwalk was heart warming…and the night was complete with pizza, hot dogs, cotton candy, and fried Reese’s peanut butter cup, fried cookie dough, and a fried Twix.
We are having the best time. I have fallen in love with my friend’s family. They are so funny, caring, and loving, it has been the best time…my only regret, not bringing them my cookies which they love. Live and learn.

Being away from everything, and relaxing at the beach has given me time to reflect…this past year I have enjoyed starting this blog but sometimes I write about stuff that is simply “time wasting,” as my Mom would say…spending time thinking about food and what we’re going to eat or not eat… Writing about my worries…Perhaps a minuscule part of life, but post worthy- not so much…Do I want to pig out every day and become a big fat cow, um no…Does anyone? But enough with the quitting sugar, low carb, no more baking crappola. Please bop me on the head if I ever mention this again and stick a newspaper in front of my face…there’s so much more to life…not to mention the fudge that I plan on buying on the boardwalk before we leave.

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Ten Cleaning Shortcuts

On July 4, 2014July 4, 2014 By JillIn I need a glass of wine, Mommy Confessions1 Comment

As you all know from my previous potty training blog Potty training jail
this house has been all a flurry with running to toilets, tearing through piles of underwear, thousands of sprays of 409 multipurpose cleaner, the use of bleach, and general disarray…

Not to mention the complete lack of activities which has been stifling as well as somewhat eye opening…and to be honest, a little heavier on the latter….more time to play, connect, and definitely ponder….about important and meaningful topics like how to connect more with my children as well as other nonsensical topics such as my famous cleaning shortcuts…the current situation at hand has inspired me to share my treasured tips.

“Oh Jill, you cleaned today, ” my husband has said from time to time after coming into the house after a long day at work ( my hard working husband- works his but off so I can be home and write this silly blog… )

Yes, the pungent smell of bleach and pine sol can hit one’s nose with a vengeance…smelling of sterile ness, spic and span-ness, and disinfection, can trick even the most obsessive compulsive clean freaks out there.

But don’t be fooled…you just never know when someone has simply used a cleaning short cut… the following are mine.

# 1 Before guests or family members arrive at your house, throw a little pine sol in the toilet and let it linger. Reminiscent of schools and hospitals, this smell is sure to convince the incoming that they are entering a cleanly house. Even Gia knows not to flush when she sees a foreign color in the bowl…”Mom, is it safe to flush the toilet or are we cleaning today?”

# 2 Hide a bucket filled with a mixture of water or bleach underneath a cabinet somewhere…the bleach scent will fill the air and send a convincing message…SANITIZED HOUSE..

#3 No need to stress about finding pairs of socks…let the kids do it and make a game of it.

This is a game we play once in a while when the sock situation gets out of hand… Go from drawer to drawer, collect all of the lonely socks, as well as the unpaired from the dryer…put in a big pile, and have a competition- child with the most pairs made gets a prize.

Get crackin girls!

# 3 On the subject of socks, do not, in any circumstance, buy white socks! Think about it.

# 5 Laundry lies…Sometimes at night, I empty out all of the hampers and put the laundry elsewhere…when my husband wakes up in the morning complaining about not being able to find a shirt or socks or whatever, I say, “Hmmm, that’s so odd! I did all of the laundry -see the hamper is empty!”

#6 Use a multi purpose cleaner to spot clean the tile… This tip is not only quick and effective and gives the illusion of a clean floor but is an arm workout as well…remember the Karate Kid…”wax on -wax off…”

#7 A lonely Barbie plastic high heel, a random plastic cookie that has dust bunnies playing on it, a menacing crayon( in this house, a crayon outside of the pack is taken as a reason to autograph the walls), shapes, small toys…JUST THROW OUT! Who has the time to return these items to their sets, boxes, or bodies…and when it’s discovered Barbie is missing her shoes, throw her out too…

# 8 Cleaning the fridge /freezer…I don’t have the time to take all of the frozen food/refrigerated food out before I clean so I just try and finish it all…”Mom, what’s for dinner?” Um, waffle, dipped in yogurt/corn sauce, or one chicken nugget, one fish stick, three sweet potato fries, a piece of cheese, half of a bagel…mmm sounds delish …I love to concoct as well but that would have to be for an entire different post. I was looking for a picture of odd food concoctions and I came across this! Wow…

This is a pork belly hamburger with cheese and bacon, nested in between two deep fried twinkles….Could you imagine eating that concoction?

#9 Nothing unique here, just frantic shoving of toys into bins before company comes…this I have to say I learned from my husband…I remember when we were first married and I was going out and we were having people over that night…I recall coming home and stepping foot into an orderly apartment and there my husband was just relaxing on the couch ( that part has not changed at all!) I was so impressed until later on, I would open a drawer or closet and it was just filled with stuff all shoved in. I was so annoyed and… now, what’s the saying? If you can’t beat em…join em…

#10 The Final shortcut is just give them a drink or two or three…Explanation is self explanatory. Happy Fourth of July everyone! It’s pouring rain by me which is why I am not out in my sparklers bikini and indoors writing this absurd post!

Virtual Cheers! It’s party time!

Potty training jail

On July 2, 2014July 2, 2014 By JillIn I need a glass of wine, Mommy Musings, What's Going On?9 Comments

I picked Friday, our first free day. We have a lot of activities during the school year so I waited until the schedule was free and we were housebound (As I am writing this, I am questioning everything about my decision making skills….seriously, why would I torture myself like this? Yea, it’s the fifth day at home, during the summer, and I haven’t left the house… kind of in shock just seeing that written…I never stay home!

I feel like a hermit crab, only coming out of her shell to go out back and then quickly back in…running for the toilet…I feel bad for the girls but they are surprisingly happy and having fun together for the most part, definitely each others best friends right now…oh so cute, running around and playing together …I can here a song in my background….”We are faaamily…I’ve got all my sistas with me…”

CRAFTS WITH THE BUSY BOX, courtesy of Tiffany:)

And then the fun is over!

I felt like I was preparing to board Noah’ s Arc prior to this day…stocking up on food, energy, and supplies… Like I was preparing for 40 days of rain …make that 40 days of pee, but I hope to God, it doesn’t take 40 days…

Anyway, the first day I woke up, got my training arsenal ready for the day and planned on an intense, diapers gone, pure potty training session.

Day one – Arianna woke up smiling and calling for mommy, not knowing that her day was going to be a little different…I took her diaper off, and all of a sudden she started to pee and I said, ” Ahh, pee, run…” And we went running to the toilet and she definitely peed on the potty! I did the happy dance and was like, “Yay, potty training!” She snarled at me…she is not one for people to make a fuss around her, especially if she’s in a mood – already she has this distinct personality where she does not want to be looked at or coddled with if she is in a “mood!”

Well, she was not happy when I told her that we weren’t putting on diapers anymore!

“No- I want my diaper, diaper, diaper…” And then a full blown scream… And more screaming…it was not pretty. Then I tried to get her to put on some underwear and she got even more angry…she was like “I don’t like underwear, no underwear !”
Ok then, I thought to myself…let’s forget about the underwear …

So, I decided to spread out all of our underwear choices on the dining room table… I simply mentioned that they were there and left it at that…kind of like leaving out cookies when someone claims they’re on a diet… Sort of temp them in a secret sort of way… NOT LIKE I WOULD EVER DO THAT… but someone I know does…um Dad…anyway, she finally came around to picking out a pair – of course, she picks the Dora ones (should have hid them since we only have two of them) yup- sure enough she wets the first two pairs and refuses to put on any other type of undies… It’s not like I’m go go gadget uber fast super washing mama…

I present her with two m&ms and she’s like, “No, whole bag, I want the bag!”
Won’t bore you with the details but that was a whole different struggle…

Gosh, I remember being in first grade and getting 100% on my spelling test and being able to go up to the teacher’s desk and choose one m&m from the glass jar the teacher had on display and was so happy with that…actually I have a few more thoughts on that subject – one is that… Eww! kind of gross thinking that we were all dipping our hand into that jar, and two…brings back memories of when I was a teacher and I would have treat jars….I was always running to the store to refill it because as soon as 3:45 hit, I was hittin that jar hard…my Mom always called the 4 pm-ish time the witching hour, especially for teachers, when you are so damn hungry, exhausted, and spent, you just want to EAT, and it’s usually not a carrot stick craving!

So…
The day goes on and we kept trying and running to the potty and almost making it…

Four days later, we were still at it…NOT FUN…I think my face says it all…

This is what I wrote yesterday- Monday…

I am not having fun, I am cranky and frustrated. I am currently writing this on my iPad-I only have 19% battery left and while anyone with a brain is thinking, uh duh, go plug in that sucker – I can’t because there is no power in my house…
Tom, “You didn’t have to go to such extremes to stop me from online shopping!” I’m quite sure the people at PSE&G think you might need to see a therapist!”

Kidding – But really, why is there a power outage? It’s a summer day, no rain, what causes these things? All I know is it’s really hot in this house…and while we’re on the subject of this house, things are not going well today! I went upstairs and two, oh great, NOW THREE wasps are in this house! Apparently, there is a nest outside and somehow they’re are finding their way in! I am petrified of wasps –
Pretty much terrified of most bugs… Then the handle on the faucet broke off. This is a picture of the bathroom faucet.

I noticed one of the kids pulled the bling off my throw pillow.

I discovered more crayon works of art in this house .

I am feeling like an inmate in this house!

Today is day four of not leaving! For those of you who regularly read my blog and know me personally, realize that I am going insane! I am experiencing severe pee pee poopied frustration, not to mention feeling creatively stifled… ( I sort of mentally shut down when I feel trapped…which is unfortunate for my kids who are probably craving the old idea mom)
It’s also that “fun time ” of the month…when I am waiting for my monthly visitor.

Perhaps, a bit TMI but I am in a “mood,” not even wine can cure today! The only thing propelling me forward is the thought of the beach…Ahhh…less than a week left till I am free of this house, and as far as the potty, she can just let loose in the ocean!

only 13% left… And this device shuts down soon, we have no tv, no power, and it’s getting darker and hotter….and I’m afraid to go outside because of the wasps in the backyard, and if I go in the front yard, I will scare small children at the dreadful site of me…haven’t showered! hair looks frightening… This is reminiscent of newborn days…ugh…remember those days moms? No sleep, no brushing teeth, feeling like you were in a scene from the night of the living zombie…and I have been rockin the wife beater all week…

ONLY THE BACK VIEW- NO BRA

Ok, I’m back, power is back on, thank goodness, Gia and I were looking at each other with looks of fear! What were we going to do with no television and internet!

So that was yesterday, and here I am today, day FIVE of this torture, and we haven’t made much progress:( On the bright side, I haven’t spent any money and am so up on laundry, and well, I wish I could say cleaning, but the whole cleaning up pee pee took all my cleaning motivation out of me!

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