Themes and Mommy Growth- Jewelry Week

On July 21, 2014July 21, 2014 By JillIn THEMES, Uncategorized, What's Going On?6 Comments

When I was in college, my Mom sent me this mouse pad (remember those?) and it had a motivational message on it. It said, “Do something.”

Yup, this simple task of simply doing something was a struggle for me (perhaps undiagnosed ADD?) I had all of this stuff in my head but couldn’t get going, continue going, that sort of a thing. This was particularly an issue in college, I couldn’t study well, write papers, or complete projects without major procrastination, and extreme debilitating anxiety. I remember wasting weeks writing index cards to study for an Anatomy exam… but then I didn’t really study the cards. I ended up failing that class and had to retake it…

This kind of a thing made the academic part of college and my work life difficult and very stressful. Extra thinking always plagues me… Researching, talking, wondering, a little progress, but mostly staying in a world of confusion, never feeling like I make a complete, satisfactory decision or complete a project with gusto is a frustrating part of my life.

And now your wondering, what does this have to do with anything? I decided to create weekly themes with the girls (for the summer) while working on some of my own problem areas…

This week was JEWELRY WEEK and my problem area that I worked on was too much thinking.

The following is the picture montage of the creative week.

Macaroni necklace and bracelets

POPCORN and gummy bear necklaces

FRUIT NECKLACES

Now we eat the fruit with yogurt- yum!

Candy necklaces – maybe not the best idea! BUT SO PRETTY!

Look at all of the candy! I think I have a problem with excess!

Making bead necklaces with friends!!! So much fun!

As for me, I took steps to just do it, buy some supplies and get working with the girls – not worrying about Ari having an accident in Michaels, perseverating on other messes in the house, getting distracted, etc…the usual thinking fluff that clogs my brain – the rust and gunk in the pipes preventing the flow of “Jilly water.” Yup, I decided to coin the flow of ideas in my head as Jilly water.

Here’s a picture of my chart. On top is an artistic masterpiece of a necklace. I colored in a “jewelry bead” at the end of the day and wrote a little note to myself. Mission accomplished – the question mark is for next week’s personal growth.

Who needs’s a self help book when you have this fab chart?

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Potty training jail

On July 2, 2014July 2, 2014 By JillIn I need a glass of wine, Mommy Musings, What's Going On?9 Comments

I picked Friday, our first free day. We have a lot of activities during the school year so I waited until the schedule was free and we were housebound (As I am writing this, I am questioning everything about my decision making skills….seriously, why would I torture myself like this? Yea, it’s the fifth day at home, during the summer, and I haven’t left the house… kind of in shock just seeing that written…I never stay home!

I feel like a hermit crab, only coming out of her shell to go out back and then quickly back in…running for the toilet…I feel bad for the girls but they are surprisingly happy and having fun together for the most part, definitely each others best friends right now…oh so cute, running around and playing together …I can here a song in my background….”We are faaamily…I’ve got all my sistas with me…”

CRAFTS WITH THE BUSY BOX, courtesy of Tiffany:)

And then the fun is over!

I felt like I was preparing to board Noah’ s Arc prior to this day…stocking up on food, energy, and supplies… Like I was preparing for 40 days of rain …make that 40 days of pee, but I hope to God, it doesn’t take 40 days…

Anyway, the first day I woke up, got my training arsenal ready for the day and planned on an intense, diapers gone, pure potty training session.

Day one – Arianna woke up smiling and calling for mommy, not knowing that her day was going to be a little different…I took her diaper off, and all of a sudden she started to pee and I said, ” Ahh, pee, run…” And we went running to the toilet and she definitely peed on the potty! I did the happy dance and was like, “Yay, potty training!” She snarled at me…she is not one for people to make a fuss around her, especially if she’s in a mood – already she has this distinct personality where she does not want to be looked at or coddled with if she is in a “mood!”

Well, she was not happy when I told her that we weren’t putting on diapers anymore!

“No- I want my diaper, diaper, diaper…” And then a full blown scream… And more screaming…it was not pretty. Then I tried to get her to put on some underwear and she got even more angry…she was like “I don’t like underwear, no underwear !”
Ok then, I thought to myself…let’s forget about the underwear …

So, I decided to spread out all of our underwear choices on the dining room table… I simply mentioned that they were there and left it at that…kind of like leaving out cookies when someone claims they’re on a diet… Sort of temp them in a secret sort of way… NOT LIKE I WOULD EVER DO THAT… but someone I know does…um Dad…anyway, she finally came around to picking out a pair – of course, she picks the Dora ones (should have hid them since we only have two of them) yup- sure enough she wets the first two pairs and refuses to put on any other type of undies… It’s not like I’m go go gadget uber fast super washing mama…

I present her with two m&ms and she’s like, “No, whole bag, I want the bag!”
Won’t bore you with the details but that was a whole different struggle…

Gosh, I remember being in first grade and getting 100% on my spelling test and being able to go up to the teacher’s desk and choose one m&m from the glass jar the teacher had on display and was so happy with that…actually I have a few more thoughts on that subject – one is that… Eww! kind of gross thinking that we were all dipping our hand into that jar, and two…brings back memories of when I was a teacher and I would have treat jars….I was always running to the store to refill it because as soon as 3:45 hit, I was hittin that jar hard…my Mom always called the 4 pm-ish time the witching hour, especially for teachers, when you are so damn hungry, exhausted, and spent, you just want to EAT, and it’s usually not a carrot stick craving!

So…
The day goes on and we kept trying and running to the potty and almost making it…

Four days later, we were still at it…NOT FUN…I think my face says it all…

This is what I wrote yesterday- Monday…

I am not having fun, I am cranky and frustrated. I am currently writing this on my iPad-I only have 19% battery left and while anyone with a brain is thinking, uh duh, go plug in that sucker – I can’t because there is no power in my house…
Tom, “You didn’t have to go to such extremes to stop me from online shopping!” I’m quite sure the people at PSE&G think you might need to see a therapist!”

Kidding – But really, why is there a power outage? It’s a summer day, no rain, what causes these things? All I know is it’s really hot in this house…and while we’re on the subject of this house, things are not going well today! I went upstairs and two, oh great, NOW THREE wasps are in this house! Apparently, there is a nest outside and somehow they’re are finding their way in! I am petrified of wasps –
Pretty much terrified of most bugs… Then the handle on the faucet broke off. This is a picture of the bathroom faucet.

I noticed one of the kids pulled the bling off my throw pillow.

I discovered more crayon works of art in this house .

I am feeling like an inmate in this house!

Today is day four of not leaving! For those of you who regularly read my blog and know me personally, realize that I am going insane! I am experiencing severe pee pee poopied frustration, not to mention feeling creatively stifled… ( I sort of mentally shut down when I feel trapped…which is unfortunate for my kids who are probably craving the old idea mom)
It’s also that “fun time ” of the month…when I am waiting for my monthly visitor.

Perhaps, a bit TMI but I am in a “mood,” not even wine can cure today! The only thing propelling me forward is the thought of the beach…Ahhh…less than a week left till I am free of this house, and as far as the potty, she can just let loose in the ocean!

only 13% left… And this device shuts down soon, we have no tv, no power, and it’s getting darker and hotter….and I’m afraid to go outside because of the wasps in the backyard, and if I go in the front yard, I will scare small children at the dreadful site of me…haven’t showered! hair looks frightening… This is reminiscent of newborn days…ugh…remember those days moms? No sleep, no brushing teeth, feeling like you were in a scene from the night of the living zombie…and I have been rockin the wife beater all week…

ONLY THE BACK VIEW- NO BRA

Ok, I’m back, power is back on, thank goodness, Gia and I were looking at each other with looks of fear! What were we going to do with no television and internet!

So that was yesterday, and here I am today, day FIVE of this torture, and we haven’t made much progress:( On the bright side, I haven’t spent any money and am so up on laundry, and well, I wish I could say cleaning, but the whole cleaning up pee pee took all my cleaning motivation out of me!

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Closing the sweet shop

On June 28, 2014 By JillIn Health eating, Mommy Confessions, Sugar and Snack Less, The Cookie Chronicles, Uncategorized, What's Going On?4 Comments

I just want to put some closure on the subject of Baking.

This is so hard for me to write about because I haven’t wanted to face the music, I have wanted to carry on like I have been, people thinking I am fine, writing my humorous posts and baking for everyone and their mothers…in the past three weeks, I have baked for the last music class, the last dance class, the last gymnastic class, the last day of school, barbeques, friends, family, and even store associates – Gazde- if your reading this, I loved baking and bringing you cookies and I love my cookies and I love making people happy with my sweets so don’t feel bad! BUT, and this is a huge BUT…

I can’t do this anymore, the constant flow of chocolate chips, licking of bowls, muffins, frosting, baking craziness- runs to the store, snacking or buying of treats for my girls, thinking about what everyone would like, what so and so likes – the oatmeal ones or the chocolate ones – what Gia’s teacher likes – frosting, and what my family likes… It’s become out of control…I am not a baker by profession, nor would I ever have chosen to be surrounded with frosting and crumbs, remember- food issues here…kind of like an alcoholic working at a bar… this isn’t my job (although it seems like it has been recently- even Gia said the other day when I ran out of flour- “Mom, you’re not even like a Mom anymore, you’re like a baker.” Yikes- isn’t that food for thought…

I feel as if baking gave me an identity, a sense of purpose, and the comments were impossible to ignore, “Jill, you’ve outdone yourself…she’s the best baker, thank you so much…the delight in people’s eyes when they eat a cookie…we love Jill’s cookies…you should start a business, how do you find the time? (That one I love the most, (sound familiar Kris?) etc…” Hard to stop bringing the goods when you feel special and important…

The truth is I am not doing “well” with baked goods and snacks. It’s just not the lifestyle I am happy living. Excess wheat and sugar seem to be aggravating anxiety and my Arianna is growing up with chocolate as a fifth food group. Nothing wrong with a bit of chocolate here and there but she hears the crinkling of a plastic bag, and is like “I want chocolate chips!”

I’ve been thinking about this for a while and I’m ready, this time – for good. The shop is closed. I love my friends and family, my kids’ teachers, and I love how it felt to bake and deliver, but I can’t be the happy, chocolate wagon anymore.

I’m setting sail for fruit islands…I may serve up a low sugar banana bread…but besides that, I am taking care of me and focusing on this family of four.

Ahhh, smelling the sweet summer fruit.