The real truth and does anyone know how to stop being a people pleaser?

On May 6, 2014May 6, 2014 By JillIn Mommy Confessions, Mommy Musings, Uncategorized, What's Going On?4 Comments

I would like to tell you the real truth about why I stopped the thirty day happy challenge. Yesterday, I wrote that it was because I already knew that I was joyful. This is still true and I stand by this. Who wouldn’t feel their heart soar with these two…

This was today in Bed, Bath, and Beyond, trying on the hats! We have fun wherever we go!

I wish that being not being happy and positive was MY ACTUAL PROBLEM. It’s pretty damn easy to take pics of the girls, in various settings, and write captions like “yay” and “cute” because they are. Not to mention that it’s so Facebookish! Or rather fakebook, I mean, let’s be honest, we all pick out our best “kodak moments” (wink wink to Mags for this one) and post them up.

case and point – my current profile picture- Don’t we look so happy and such a cute family!

So, I am happy but something is weighing on me like the big feet of an elephant! I have people in my head, constantly, I see their faces and can almost feel their thoughts! I suppose I am the chosen one…right? The girl who is responsible for everyone…

OR so I thought! I have read this and heard this so many times – the fact that most people are not thinking about you.

However, I still have been living, geesh, for as long as I can remember like this…
It sort of sucks!

I wake up, and usually start panicking about my to do list…I always seem to have so much to do… And their is a constant whirl of thoughts going through my brain… Lately it has been about this damn blog, which IS THE MAIN REASON I want to quit it… I just don’t know what to write about, who I should be?

Should I be happy and cheery and make my family happy? I know they feel better when I am cheery, lighthearted, and fun… Should I be tired, drinking, and spent – that is sure to make the sad moms feel better about themselves … Should I be crafty, baking, adventurous? That’s sure to get more web traffic!

And then there’s the baking/ gift giving / social event problem that I have…
Always feel the need to bake, to create perfect gifts, like for teachers, friends, etc…, and worry at social events and parties – am I eating enough of their food? drinking enough? (Well maybe not that one!) Did I bring the right gift… It’s downright exhausting!

You see my predicament! Might as well just eat worms….but I can’t because they’re gross. And I don’t think I’m going to start a new 30 day challenge of how to stop people pleasing and start people annoying, although my husband would love that!

He is the opposite of me and is always encouraging me to disappoint people, say no, and not to give a flying fuck…he’s not a bad guy…I see you all getting this image of a monster… Sending me referrals for a divorce lawyer!

He’s just trying to get me to see things differently… So that’s that – just felt like telling the truth… I have a few people to talk to tomorrow about a few situations…. Going to get to bottom of what people really think about baking, gifts, and perfection! Let’s see what information we come up with…

Feel free to comment now folks! Those of you who read this on Facebook, put in your email and comment… It could help other people pleaser problem people who are reading this!

This is getting boring – day seven of thirty day challenge

On May 5, 2014May 5, 2014 By JillIn Uncategorized1 Comment

Hi all! I am feeling so happy, saw the best people this weekend! Had so much fun with my family, and “for the first time in forever…”
JUST KIDDING! Just saw it, for the thousandth time, couldn’t resist!

Like I was going to say! Laughed, like a real belly laugh- Tom was making fun of me, of the errands that I deem so important! like a return or trip to Harmon’s … Or all of these “so called stressors” that I have….yea, being a SAHM has caused me to fret about the stupidest errands!

Which brings me to my next point. I quit this thirty day challenge because I realize that I am happy. It only took one week, to see it in print, to think about my daily life and how blessed we are with all of our friends and fun!

Every day is good, even the crappy days…

I always have someone I can call and moan to, I have the cutest girls in the world( granted everyone thinks that about their own kids) but come on… Look at these two….

And the weeks are just flying by…filled with activities and parties!

The girls with their microphones singing!

Sooo… No need to continue this challenge because things are good, on the kid and family front. They’re all taken care of.

So that leaves me… Not quite sure. I wouldn’t say I feel taken care of, or doing what is good for me… But it’s late and I don’t have any answers there, for now… So I’ll think about this….

So cliche isn’t it… Mommy takes care of everyone, and her friends, and neglects herself!

Hope you all had a great weekend!

Day three- Make it, Love it, Do it – Positive thoughts

On April 30, 2014May 1, 2014 By JillIn Mommy Confessions, Mommy Musings, Thirty day challenge - Make it, Do it, Love it, Uncategorized6 Comments

Day three of Make it, Love it, Do it – Positive thoughts is great!

The nonstop, pouring rain is not bringing us down! We had a fun morning in Rolling Rascals! Arianna was excited to go this morning and was a ball of energy!
,

Always love seeing other moms, even just looking at each other and smiling, don’t even need to say anything, you feel a connection that we are all in this together and feeling the same thing, whether it be exhaustion, confusion, or laughter, we have each other’s backs!

And this goes for “non class” friends too, especially Jessica, Erin, and Michelle, who have listened to me endlessly through the rough patches!
AND OF COURSE… My therapist from the sunny state and number one commenter, aka, Mommy in Florida! And a soon to be “non class” friend, Joy- really going to miss you!

The rest of the day was productive – finally returned the jar of sauce that has been rolling around in my car for weeks! Yup, I’m a certified obsessive returner! I return everything and we didn’t like this sauce.

The brand RAO’S is so delicious and 100% approved by my Italian husband who likes to make his own home-made sauce, but only the regular Marinara Sauce and the Vodka Sauce, not the mushroom, sausage one! The sauce isn’t cheap so I got my $8.23 back!

Got a present for a birthday party this weekend and of course had to get something for the girls. They are attracted to the strangest items!

Well, the puzzle isn’t odd but Gia put together this other puzzle we already have so fast, I wanted to get her something more challenging! Perfect for tomorrow, another rainy day- third in a row:( OH WAIT! I actually love rainy days-so calming!

Good eats
Made beer batter fish for dinner. It was a total winner all around, Gia gobbled up a huge piece! Tom says, ” delicious , crispy, way better than I can make!”

That’s it for tonight! I’m sure some of my readers are rolling their eyes at these lighthearted posts, missing the wine drinking, complaining gal… And I am just going to have to say oh well! A huge problem I have is people pleasing and worrying what others think so this is PROGRESS!

This is an old Jill worrier face!
p.s I still love wine!!! And the frowny Jill is just shoved the bottom of a hamper….for now